2015-04-21 14:32:34 UTC
among English children.
It was foiled by a tradition instituted by the late William Hartnell
when he sodomised Carole Ann Ford onscreen during the live broadcast of
The Rim of Destruction.
Successive Doctor Whos (or as they say in Britain, Doctors Who) have
honoured his memory by fucking every woman to appear on the show since.
However it took until 2005 for Doctor Who to get some of that sweet,
sweet manloving. As soon as he met bisexual whore Captain Jack
Harkness, the Doctor jumped at the chance to fuck the strapping young
Fortunately, when he regenerated shortly after getting laid, Doctor Who
ran as far as possible from Jack, rather than resume their relationship
and spent several years avoiding his phone calls and even fled to the
end of time. Jack, to this day, wonders why the Doctor fucked him then
fled the next morning, before he woke up.
Further evidence of the Doctor's faggotry comes in the following three
seasons where the Doctor goes through three long-term female
companions, not to mention his short time with Kylie Minogue, and
manages to get absolutely zero fucking done, even though the first two
were in love with him.
He was so desperate to avoid fucking the first one, he arranged an
elaborate scheme to get her stuck in an inescapable alternate universe,
which she subsequently escaped from, then gave her a clone of himself
To dump the second girl, he had her family racially cleansed by his
Nazi boyfriend the Master, and they were all half-negro anyway. The
third tart we can't really blame him for, because she was a ginger &
fat. She was however, the most important woman in the universe for a
More recently, allegations of the Doctor's gayness have resurfaced
after Flesh and Stone, where Amy Pond was clearly handing it to him on
a plate and while viewers were wanking furiously, the Doctor thought
"no that's not a good idea", proving beyond all reasonable doubt that
he's fucking queer. That, or newcomer writer Steven Moffat was
desperately trying to undo the rampant faggotry inflicted upon the show
by his predecessor, Russell T Davies.