Post by Turlough Post by The Highlander Post by Turlough
How do you *see* a discussion, DSH?
He's fishing for a chance to announce that Charles and he are cousins.
Where did all these kooks come from, Highlander? I was going to ask Auld
Bob to wheel out the Burns Unit, to speed up the inevitable, but these
whacks would probably enjoy the poetry and prose and start threads on
the pros and cons of alliteration and other incredibly fascinating
devices. I was also going to toss out one of my standard incendiary
*some of Queen Mum's ancestors came from Roscommon, etc* quips, but I
didn't want to be responsible for any of these olde duffers having a
That's very caring of you, Turlough! Here's how it works:
soc.culture.scottish and soc.culture.irish are irresistible targets
because they are two of the world's most interesting cultures.
In both groups the same agendas are at work. They are as follows:
People who are of Scottish or Irish descent who want to connect with
People who aren't of Scottish or Irish descent but would love to be.
People with an axe to grind, aka "The English" and "The Australians".
People overcome with envy because the Scots can move smoothly into sex
mode by merely flipping up their kilts instead of spending hours
trying to disentangle their Y-fronts from their Doc Martins while
hobbling after their encounter of the evening, shouting, "Come back!
I love you! Didn't I buy you two rum and cokes!"
Irish people overcome with envy because the Scots have the knack of
wheedling free drinks out of tourists.
Scots overcome with envy because the Irish can blow up pubs where
tourists don't offer them free drinks and get away with it. "It was da
Rah, yer honour!"
Men who want to be Braveheart.
Women who want to be interfered with by Braveheart.
Men who want to have a shower with Braveheart.
Men who want to join an IRA Active Service Unit.
Men who read Ray's memoirs and decide to pass.
Men who are drawn to the Scots/Irish image of unlimited violence.
Women who believe that Ireland is the land of the fairies.
Men who hope that Ireland is the land of the fairies.
People who think the Scots and Irish are "cute".
People who hate the Scots and the Irish for being "cute".
People who want to wear skirts but are afraid their mothers will find
out, unless there is an excuse, like "wearing the dress of my
ancestors!" (Fashion warning: a cute little summer number with polka
dots and a low bustline just isn't going to cut it, If you decide to
go for it anyway, at least shave your chest.)
People who want to spend the rest of their lives in a drunken stupor
shouting "Fuck the Bastard English!" or "Feck da Prods/Taigs!"
People who are bored with soc.culture.british and want more out of
Usenet than whining in four-part harmony.
People who are demented and think scs/sci can be a home on the Net.
People who get off on tormenting the demented.
People like you and I who watch all this with bemused wonder.