Glenallan
2004-07-18 11:42:54 UTC
I don't know whether it is right to mention this in polite
company, but it is a social phenomenon that has to be
addressed at some time, just the same.
Back in the nineteen-fifties, before the wonderful benefits
of free orange juice and cod-liver oil kicked in, many of the
ladies ill able to afford nylons, gave visible evidence of
Corn Beef legs. It is arguable, really, whether this was a
medical or a social phenomenon.
Basically, there were some unfortunates who had a ferocious
pattern, much like a road map of Italy etched into their legs.
This was not a pretty site and was often camouflaged by
a variety of means.
In a less educated era, this was believed to have been caused by
sitting too close to the electric fire, a notion that held almost
universal currency. As I recall, the victims were widely scorned
and vilified as being 'unclean'.
Later on I realised that this distressing affliction was not unique to
women, but that men suffered this in equal proportion, though
the merciful qualities of long trousers kept this concealed from
an inquisitive and biased public.
This of course is now recognised as a circulatory problem, which
may be treated with moderate success, though not in all cases.
So, in a spirit of sharing, next time you see a lady
with Corned Beef Legs, just say to her...
"I know yer no' a dirty bugger, Hen. It's jist yer bad circulation."
She will appreciate your candour.
--
Glenallan
----------
company, but it is a social phenomenon that has to be
addressed at some time, just the same.
Back in the nineteen-fifties, before the wonderful benefits
of free orange juice and cod-liver oil kicked in, many of the
ladies ill able to afford nylons, gave visible evidence of
Corn Beef legs. It is arguable, really, whether this was a
medical or a social phenomenon.
Basically, there were some unfortunates who had a ferocious
pattern, much like a road map of Italy etched into their legs.
This was not a pretty site and was often camouflaged by
a variety of means.
In a less educated era, this was believed to have been caused by
sitting too close to the electric fire, a notion that held almost
universal currency. As I recall, the victims were widely scorned
and vilified as being 'unclean'.
Later on I realised that this distressing affliction was not unique to
women, but that men suffered this in equal proportion, though
the merciful qualities of long trousers kept this concealed from
an inquisitive and biased public.
This of course is now recognised as a circulatory problem, which
may be treated with moderate success, though not in all cases.
So, in a spirit of sharing, next time you see a lady
with Corned Beef Legs, just say to her...
"I know yer no' a dirty bugger, Hen. It's jist yer bad circulation."
She will appreciate your candour.
--
Glenallan
----------